CEO -Chief Embezzlement Officer
CFO -Corporate Fraud Officer.
BULL MARKET -A random market movement causing an investor
to mistake himself for a financial genius.
VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E RATIO -The percentage of investors wetting their pants
as the market keeps crashing
BROKER -What my broker has made me.
STANDARD & POOR -Your life in a nutshell.
STOCK ANALYST -Idiot who just downgraded your stock
STOCK SPLIT -When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets
equally between themselves
FINANCIAL PLANNER -A guy whose phone has been disconnected.
MARKET CORRECTION -The day after you buy stocks.
YAHOO -What you yell after selling it to some poor sucker for $240 per share.
WINDOWS -What you jump out of when you're the sucker
who bought Yahoo @ $240 per share.
CASH FLOW-The movement your money makes as it disappears
down the toilet.
INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.
PROFIT -An archaic word no longer in use.
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